tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post8443245365668646066..comments2024-02-25T19:41:47.843-08:00Comments on Know Prashant : On Calculative PeoplePrashant Singhhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10079032946958487411noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-72574958507093015012011-10-17T00:37:33.009-07:002011-10-17T00:37:33.009-07:00yes, people are calculative, cautious, manipulativ...yes, people are calculative, cautious, manipulative... whatever words you use to describe them, even more when it comes to an important decision like marriage.<br /><br /><br />Isn't that how the indian matrimonial system works?<br />Isn't that how we all have been conditioned?<br /><br />Marriage is just like another of those exams where you have to score higher than the people around you.<br /><br />Searching for a bride / groom? you should be looking for caste, wealth, property, family status, permanent job, handsome salary, fair color etc etc... <br /><br />and no, you will be a utter fool to ask for traits like good nature, honesty, truthfulness.. those are <br />the least sought-after things.<br />Compatibility ? we have that kundli matching thing to take care of that. :)<br /><br />... and we all know, that despite all the odds, marriages in India survive.<br /><br />so really, why waste time over things like mutual trust or respect or transparency?<br /><br />Why not package yourself in a nice shiny wrapper so that you attract better buyers, even if that means reducing one's status to a lifeless product...<br />Albeit, it will be a shiny product to be sold at a high price...<br />or may be an exchange for an equally shiny, high priced, but not so great product.<br /><br /><br />Ain't I right?J Phttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18100720274129245344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-54799817617769075892011-08-24T23:12:30.679-07:002011-08-24T23:12:30.679-07:00The visit was useful. Content was really very info...The visit was useful. Content was really very informative. From www.rightbooks.inrightbooks86https://www.blogger.com/profile/11250876900009107968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-73106804704719782512011-04-21T00:52:45.245-07:002011-04-21T00:52:45.245-07:00Hi, Prashant.
My sister directed me here. Enjoyed...Hi, Prashant.<br /><br />My sister directed me here. Enjoyed reading your insights and feelings here. Saw you as an individual who knows himself and stands for his integrity and values. Good, very good. Keep it that way, most of us learn it the hard way. Got motivated to share my own exp:<br /><br />On serendipity: Surely a fascinating and all of us want it to happen concept. Indian movies' USP, but in practicality, as far as our times go, won't work. We are still directed by several forms of conditioning and obligations that being with the person we should be comes as pure chance. So our parents, many in our Y generation came together for calculative reasons, be it was caste, social strata, natal charts, parent pressure... Hope for the best for all the teenagers now, they are going to make some changes. <br /><br />On spine: Been there done that, yes, I grew a spine after being in a 7 year relationship. Yes, I did, but it took two severe beatings - from a well educated professional, tons of mental and emotional abuse, and some serious scarring of my heart, but faith in god I am my life changed. I am happily divorced and found myself a better man - serendipitously - <br /><br />On calculative people: It's our brain, the primitive one, the limbic one, it's been looking out for us for 150 million years. It is just our primitive survival instincts that make us be misrepresent. As kids as soon as we learn about how we can manipulate our parents, we use our charm; use it in school to be in good books of teachers; then in jobs for we have reviews every six months, the list goes on and on. But sure Hail the Spine, people should know that there will be the day of the Spine, and when that day will come all their charms, dramas, words, and gifts would fail. <br /><br />Thanks, and if you want to edit some portions of this post before posting, you can.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-24027417434644311952011-04-20T02:40:39.459-07:002011-04-20T02:40:39.459-07:00So, i was having a leisure time in office, and tho...So, i was having a leisure time in office, and thought of reading blogs. Started with Paulo Coelho blog and then reached on yours.<br />So, I guess I am getting some good luck (as you mentioned in the intro) while I am writing the comment.<br />Have you say, I enjoyed it much more than the blog posts of Mr Coelho. :-)<br />The narration was like a short story and I almost toppled from my chair laughing on "you are just like a stranger" episode.<br />Amazing post dude!!Shikhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11461065367425985753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-45951348150883699552011-01-07T01:02:10.506-08:002011-01-07T01:02:10.506-08:00Interesting read, but I am not so sure if delibera...Interesting read, but I am not so sure if deliberate action can or should be replaced by luck. Agree that the reasoning might be flawed sometimes or in some cases it maybe too complex for a third person to understand...but banking on serendipity to achieve a desired goal doesnt seem to make sense. And no matter how much one calculates its impossible to overcome the risk that is inherent in life.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-74426420264106356682010-04-11T06:53:59.128-07:002010-04-11T06:53:59.128-07:00you have good sense of humour...but try to write o...you have good sense of humour...but try to write on hot or burning topics to get tremendous hits...<br />good luck buddy..<br /><br />http://www.travelcorporation.blogspot.comTCIhttp://www.tcindia.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-10417187096084322232010-04-10T04:42:36.253-07:002010-04-10T04:42:36.253-07:00@amit : funny you mentioned about ppl changing . m...@amit : funny you mentioned about ppl changing . many ppl say that . i hope they are right.<br />" It takes a lot of guts for someone this daring to admit this about him/her self."<br />not sure she fits the description . her admission would have mattered if she would have told it to potential stake holder (future spouse ). what she was doing was two step short of a well thought out conspiracy and she was asking me to help her in that deception . sorry No benefit of doubt here .Prashant Singhhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10079032946958487411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-64887763040657960712010-04-10T04:05:00.461-07:002010-04-10T04:05:00.461-07:00@sachin: Thanks dude .@sachin: Thanks dude .Prashant Singhhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10079032946958487411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-191272640659189862010-04-09T09:02:44.460-07:002010-04-09T09:02:44.460-07:00He he :) .. Someone is again assuming that lines a...He he :) .. Someone is again assuming that lines are carved in stone. In reality, they are in sand, people change everyday.<br /><br />Good thing to take out from this: Always pay for your food, avoid getting "f*****" on breakfast table. <br /><br />And It takes a lot of guts for someone this daring to admit this about him/her self. <br /><br />I recommend you go to the wedding if you get an invitation. :o)amithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11233056763283764107noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-82949441978943593762010-03-30T01:42:50.067-07:002010-03-30T01:42:50.067-07:00Good post ...nice narrative.....it was gripping :)...Good post ...nice narrative.....it was gripping :)sachingaurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01349293302394410336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-6906911630844012572010-03-14T22:14:21.674-07:002010-03-14T22:14:21.674-07:00Thanks Alaknanda :
you have provided a nice frame...Thanks Alaknanda :<br /><br />you have provided a nice framework for shortlisting :) <br /><br />BTW I am amazed by your observation power . I wasn't aware that I am so obvious here . not that i mind that though.Prashant Singhhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10079032946958487411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-36377115060796711912010-03-14T12:58:22.913-07:002010-03-14T12:58:22.913-07:00so, ok, this is the last post i can see. I hv spen...so, ok, this is the last post i can see. I hv spent far too much time here than i shud..i shud be writing my dissertation chapters!!<br />(Just to tell u, that i liked ur posts.) Some I enjoyed a lot. Some were fine. But what comes thru is the amazing honesty and brutality with which u face life, and the soft river of pain that is running underneath. <br />And that is what is the answer to your question, i think- (tho tarun is free to give his experience based answer) Ppl change, and that's a fact. Especially after marriage. But that has to do with so many other things changing in life too. The best course of action is find a person who agrees with your values (and believe me, honesty and non-manipulative behaviour is a good starting point) , shares some concerns (environment, kids :)), has concerns (and a mind) of her own and can appreciate what is the best thing(s) about you. Rest, as u said somewhere, is romance/clutter. <br />Best luck, keep writing.Alaknandanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-48633569409094094792010-03-12T04:11:12.526-08:002010-03-12T04:11:12.526-08:00Really ? While I admire the humor in your quote I ...Really ? While I admire the humor in your quote I am afraid if this thing is really that random ? Since you are more experienced in this matter . What's the best course of action ?Prashant Singhhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10079032946958487411noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9276397.post-13241194241065276112010-03-04T15:33:54.643-08:002010-03-04T15:33:54.643-08:00oh you young kids !!
dont you know - it does not ...oh you young kids !!<br /><br />dont you know - it does not matter whom you marry. they will turn out to be somebody else anyways :-)tarun upadhyayhttp://tarun.menoreply@blogger.com