George Carlin - Airline Announcements

Very Funny

George Carlin - Airline Announcements
Uploaded by PigLips

When Bhuddha Meets Spidey

No , Jack Daniel was No Saint . But He did Started something of a Religon

Tagline of Jack Daniel Whiskey

In previous post I told you about my childhood fascination with Gautam Buddha and how I aspired to leave world in search of truth. I also mentioned that very soon I would be running out of my long-standing excuse of not going on the journey. Buddha was one influence.

There were few more Heroes of mine. Chacha Chaudhary, Super commando Dhruv, Oshin, Siddharth Basu, Vyomkesh Bakshi, & Spiderman. [ This is what happens when you spend most of your time in front of TV while your pals are playing "Gulli Danda" in street]. Out of all these characters Spiderman was the most influencing figure. So much so that my mom used to tell us that "if you don't complete your homework by 4:00 PM, I won't let you watch Spiderman" and I tell you there was not a single occasion when we missed it [provided that there was no power cut]. Such was the madness that my brother and me used to sing along the title song of that serial. We didn't actually know the lyrics but someone told us that toward the end of each stanza it says, "Here comes the Spiderman "and that was enough for us. We use to speak some gibberish all along just to say, "Here comes the Spiderman” just at the right time.

It was not just his superhero acts like casting web, punching hard, beating BAD guy and flying on threads, which made him my favorite. For me at least, part of his appeal was also due to the fact that his alter ego Peter Parker was a total loser in real life. Bullied by guys, good at studies, girls respected him but none of the damsels love him. I possessed exactly the same characteristic. [This respect Vs love problem is chronic in my life. will write a full post on it someday]. Anyway, so for a good part of my school life I was secretly wishing that one day some spider will bite me and I will morph in to some kind of superhero. But like rest of the females around me, females of spider species too, didn't find me worthy of a bite. All I was asking for was just one bite. Imagine how deprived of emotions they were [both spider and girls]...To hell with both of them...

At times I felt that teachings of Buddha & Spiderman were pulling me in opposite directions. Which was strange because I was under the impression that both of them were embodiment of the same principal." To think beyond your own narrow self interest, to think about your fellow human being and do something for them". But this knowledge doesn't make my quest any easier. Then one day while I was having a beer I had a flash of insight. [This usually happen after third bottle but that it happened on after first, so I have good reason to believe that there was more to it than just alcohol]. I wonder what would Buddha would have thought about Spiderman’s way of saving the world .so for last few weeks I was having this strange urge to imagine how a meeting Between Buddha and Spidey will go.

Than one night I had a dream and in the dream I saw Buddha and Spidey Talking to each other. [Trust me on this. I am not making this up. I actually had a dream. And Spidey looked a lot like me]. Like Carry Grant and Deborah Kerr, & Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan they were having this conversation on top of Empire state building. It was well past midnight [Which makes perfect sense since only watchman, BPO workers & super heroes work in the night]. Here is what little I remember of the conversation.

[Spidey]: " So you are Buddha."
[Buddha]: (Smiling) " Yes, I am. But not for you Peter .You can call me Siddhartha"
[Spidey]: Siddhartha, Ah that’s Better. But hey wait a minute. How do you know I am Peter?? . Oh never mind you are god you know everything.
[Buddha]: (Smiling) You can say that. I know a lot more than that.
[Spidey] :Of course you do. What brings you to New York?
[Buddha] :I am everywhere.
[Spidey]: [Smirking] All right .............Why you choose to talk to me? Why now?
[Buddha]: Well I want that we should work together. I believe we can do a lot of good to the world if we come together.
[Spidey]: <>
[Buddha]: [Amused] what is the matter? You think it’s not a good idea?
[Spidey]: Ah. Oh No it’s not like that Holy man.
[Buddha]: Then what is it?
[Spidey]: Well you will find it funny but last time some one asked me to team up with him was when I was talking to ...
[Buddha]: [interrupts] Norman Osborn ...The infamous Green Goblin.
[Spidey] :Oh so you know. Are you watching those stupid movies? Do you actually Buy Tickets??
[Buddha]: [smiling] You are forgetting something Peter! I am Buddha.
[Spidey] :Oh ya how can I do that ...YOU ARE All knowing All seeing,"No-Need to Buy Ticket " Holy Buddha.
[Buddha]: [Laughs] so what you think of my proposal. Lets work together.
[Spidey]: Well I am touched and honored by the offer but it won't be possible? I can't leave New York
[Buddha]: Why??
[Spidey]: Mary Jane.
[Buddha] :Oh. She is a sweet child.
[Spidey] :Oh you know her too. Nice. So you know I can't leave her
[Buddha]: And you can refuse this offer??
[Spidey] :I have no choice.
[Buddha]: Talk sense Peter, I gave up my family for the cause .I am not asking you to do the same.You can always stay in touch over cell phone and we will be coming to New York once is a while ".
[Spidey] :Its Not that easy Holy Man .You doesn’t understand. Time has changed. Long distance relationships don’t work. You will find me on phone all the time. How will I fight the evil of world with one hand??
[Buddha]: Umm...I will buy you a Bluetooth headset.
[Spidey]: Nice try. But it won't work.
[Buddha]: [Irritated] Are you telling me that you will pass on the opportunity to work with me because you can't stand a long distance relationship?
[Spidey] :In a way, Yes.
[Buddha]: You are no super hero
[Spidey]: May be. But at least I won't abandon my wife and family in night like you.
[Buddha]: That was below the belt Peter
[Spidey] :I don't see any belt on your dress
[Buddha] :It's not you. Its Mary Jane speaking in your voice.
[Spidey] :Oh! so you know that too. ...[Rolls his eyes]
[Spidey] :I am sorry Holy man! Please don't be upset. Your cause won't suffer because of my not being with you.
[Buddha] :I AM upset Peter. I need someone to reposition my teachings, to make them more relevant to this generation. And you are just the right Brand Ambassador.
[Spidey]: May be you can go to London and talk to Superman.
[Buddha]: Don’t tell me what to do. I am upset with you. I curse you that in next life you will suffer a long distance relationship.
[Spidey]: No! Holy man, don’t do that.
[Buddha]: You made your choice Peter. I can't take my words back.
[Spidey]: Holy man, don’t do that. What would I do?
[Buddha]: Relax Peter, you are a good guy. You will figure out a way. Remember what you said in the last scene of the fist movie on your life
[Spidey]: What?
[Buddha]: Remember…and you will find your answer. Take care and keep on doing the great work. My blessings are with you.
--------------------------Buddha Vanishes -----------------------------
[Spidey]: [walking and thinking] What did I said in the last scene of Spiderman Part 1. Damn... I shouldn't have slept in movie hall. What was it? Should I call Marry Jane?? No. She will be furious to know that I was sleeping. Gotta think of something else. God Help me...[Looks Up to sky]

[Off screen voice of God] whatever life holds in store for me, I will never forget these words: "With great power comes great responsibility." This is my gift, my curse. Who am I? I'm Spider-man.

[Spidey]: Looks up in sky. Picks up his mask and says to himself: Who am I? I'm Spider-man.

At that moment my dream was broken. I was woken up by the sound of my cell phone. My girlfriend was calling. We had a pleasant conversation. I didn't mention about this dream. For many days to come I was thinking what Spidey would have done after that? I wish that I have the dream again and see the sequel. But it has not happened.

Then one day I found the answer at most unsuspecting place .In a sketchbook. I was having a dinner with my friend Sunandini Basu (AKA Soo). There I happened to see her sketchbook. She seems to have a fixation with another hero. Superman. There was some sketch that showed what possibly could have happened to Spidey after that meeting. I am reproducing it here with her permission.

So now its clear to me that in spite of common goal Buddha and Spidey cannot go hand in hand. But does that make anything easy? No. Moral of the story?

There is no moral I guess. You can't be Spidey and you can't be Buddha either. I will have to search for a new hero. How about being Prashant? Or Sunandini [for girls]. Does that sound like name of a Superhero???

Note: Regular Reader of my Blog might notice a spectacular rise in grammar Accuracy in this post . my Girlfriend did a proofreading of the draft of this post . Sso if you are having a sigh of relief because of lack of spelling and grammar mistakes on this blog than you know whom to Thanks :-)

Understanding The Making Of Buddha

As a little boy living up in a small city in Rajasthan I grew up in a blissful ignorance . Life was simple . I used to go to scholl, read two -three news papers everyday after lunch and used to play some street games after finishing my homework.

I was kinda shielded from all the cognitive overload children face today .I didn't have to go to tuitions,hobby classes,English speaking class or some other crap like that . I used to read what I like . Ours is not a family of great scholars like the one you find in Calcutta ,not by any stretch of imagination. But three of my Bhua( My Dad's sister) were doing their Graduation and post graduation in Hindi and Social science . My mother has an Masters Degree in Hindi. I inherited my taste in reading from her. so i was somewhat familiar with the Hindi literature .

we had an old store room on second floor of our house where there was a BIG stack of books .On weekends,specially on summer weekends when there was no electricity I used to go to that old room (when everyone else used to be asleep) and used to read some stuff . One of my fave book was a book about Gautam Buddha . Not a religious scripture or something but just a story in great details of his life . I was fascinated by the life of Gautam Buddha . I didn't understood it completely but I was hooked . later on I also read some poems about Yashodhara , written by Maithali sharan Gupt. Yashodhara was Siddharth's Wife . Thanks to my govt school education and understanding of hindi I was able to enjoy it very very much . (thankfully few of them are also available online for free .you can read it Here Here & Here ) .

Anyways, back to Gautam Buddha . I am sure each one of you know the story . I was fascinated by the tale and wanted to do something like that . But irony of life ....I was never able to leave home in search of truth . I seriously thought of doing that more than few times in my life . but I never took any concrete action . I was afraid of dark, didn't had much pocket money , and hell I was not married to a pretty lady like Yahsodhara at the age of 16 and other stupid rationalization like that.But I was firm determined that some day I will go on the voyage of my life .


Biggest rationalization of all was that even Siddharth set out on this journey at the age of 29.
I was only 13 -14 year of age. I thought ,I still have time .I started using this time for various activity like hunting for dates, trying to study , planing trips , juggling various identities forced upon me and ofcourse reading and writing blog.

But every now and than , whenever I saw the futility and worthlessness of my existence , whenever I have to face the fact that I am not doing anything which would make "a dent in universe " . I used too tell myself "Hey !! at my age it was same for Gautam Buddha" .

But not anymore . I will turn 30 this month . :)

I love to believe that I have seen a lot in life . but it seems that "a lot " by my standards is not enough . I have seen suffering , I have seen hope, I have seen mirth , I have seen depression , I have seen action. I have seen innocence , I have seen perverted minds, have seen self sufficiency of accomplishment , I have seen our need to celebrate by sharing .But still I haven't achieved the critical mass to break free and set out on a voyage in search of truth . I wonder if I will ever be able to do that.

What is it that I lack and Siddharth possessed which gave him the courage to make a difference ? was he destined to do what he did ? i don't think so . i am religious but not a big believer in the theory that everything is planed and we are just puppets .

What do you think ?? Please share your views with me . I was thinking about it for quiet some time and i hit upon a somewhat different explanation for this . i am refining it right now . will be sharing them in next post. till than please tell your thoughts

To be continued............

[ First ] Love's Labour Lost

“First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity.”~G. B. Shaw

Disclaimer : As I am writing this i am under influence of alcohol , not that I am a Tea Totaler or something but this is for the first time I am writing a blog post after drinking . and fact that you can read it means that I can write properly and which in turn implies that i didn't took beer in excess.


So when was the first time you fell in love ? if you are like majority of Indian male population than chances are that your last love was your first love and it was an arranged marriage .( if this is the case than I suggest that you might as well stop reading this post here only. if you choose to continue than don't blame me that i haven't warned you beforehand .)

If you belong to the minority of Indian Male population than chances are that you have long since forgotten who was your first love . perhaps She was a girl you saw in train , at Biology tuition , your English teacher , head girl in your school, your elder sister's friend who used to pull your cheek every time she came home or distant cousin of a family in neighborhood who visited them once in her summer vacation and you used to play Satoliya with her (she promised to come back next summer. you cajoled your sister to maintain a correspondence with her till the next summer ,you happily parted with a significant chunk of your pocket money in doing that but that girl didn't showed up in summer break) .

Chances are that all of these damsels are married by now and YOU are the one who is single . while reading these words may invoke long forgotten emotion in your heart but truth is that those girls don't give a shit even if you die tomorrow . I have no words to comfort you other than
" Welcome to the brotherhood " .

After these two broad segments there is a third and last category of Indian males , who either had a serious affair with the female in Q or somehow managed to marry her . they are so rare that we can safely call them Mutant . and exclude them from the scope of this study .

if you are in "Brotherhood " its very much likely that you don't talk about her too often if you talk about her at all (Thats why you are enjoying this post , you think i don't know ? ) . You often tell yourself "I can't believe I was that stupid ". Well you were "That stupid " but thats only half the truth . other half of the truth is more disturbing than the one which shows your stupidity . whats that ?

Time Travel

Imagine for a moment that I throw you back to the place and time of your first love and I force you to see all of your so called stupidity . How will you feel ? you will feel embarrassed to death ?
well ....not exactly .you will feel embraced for sure but you will see the other half too . the more disturbing half .

It happened to me yesterday a random event somehow reminded me of one of my first love . I was checking out Youtube to download video of some songs . while doing that I stumbled upon music video of a song from a movie i saw in college time . there in that movie was that girl Her name was Neha , She was an Actress ,Kareeb was her debut movie . When I saw that movie for the first time I was spellbound , I was awestruck by beauty of Neha . She was so innocent that my mouth was more open and my eyes were more wide than usual . I still remember the words i said "She is fresh n innocent like a dew drop " .

I felt She is the ONE . What the fuck she is doing in the dirty world of Bollywood . I prayed to god that the movie should fail and she packs her bag and go home . When i will start earning i will go to her place and marry her . (Seriously, that was the plan and because I was the one doing all the planing so there was no need of Plan B ) .

I learned that I was not the only one who was smitten by Neha Bug , few more guys in my hostel were suffering from it . we were sympathetic to each other and used to say "May the Best Man Win " . Those were the days when a beer bottle used to cost 70 Rs and it used to last half of night . three beer bottle used to be enough for whole night . I clearly remember one such night in hostel when two of us who were suffering Neha Bite (Back then We were very good at coining new terms ) were drinking .there was a Giant poster of Neha on the wall . the other guy told me a little secret which he never shared with anyone . he was firm determined to marry her , and you can't fail to see the conviction in his eyes . He was hallucinating. He said he has been to that college in Delhi where She was a student . I was impressed i said " I am touched by your emotion man , if i happen to meet her before you I will tell her about it , even at the risk of jeopardizing my chance " he said " I know you will , We are friends and don't worry i will take good care of her "

Than he went on to his cupboard and brought a brown envelop . inside that envelop was a Yellow dupatta somewhat similar to the one shown in the video embedded above . He tied it to the cooler and place the poster in front of it than he switched on the cooler . dupatta was flowing in the air somewhat in the same manner like shown in the video above .

It was his room ,his cooler and his duppatta so I let him play the role of Bobby Deol . We also discussed a scene in the song where she plant a Kho-Kho Kiss ( A type of Touch and run Kiss ) on Bobby Deol's Cheek .Grand jury of Neha struck guys unanimously declared that it was just the way a nice indian girl should kiss , not the way Karishma kapoor kissed Amir Khan in Raja Hindustani . we were two steps short of issuing a fatwa against Karishma .

We were a bunch of guys 19 years of age ,studying in a professional college ,we had cleared a highly competitive exam . what do you make out of our action ? Elixir of Stupidity ?? Teenage madness ??

Yes but thats only one half , if you look beyond the surface you will see something else . you will see that we were not afraid to dream . we were full of possibility , we were convinced that exceptional things can happen to us . We were special . We believed in fair play , We didn't mind loosing grace fully to our peers . We used to listen to PinkFloyd and we didn't wanted to be another brick in the wall .

They're not that different from you, are they? Same haircuts. Full of hormones, just like you. Invincible, just like you feel. The world is their oyster. They believe they're destined for great things, just like many of you, their eyes are full of hope, just like you. Did they wait until it was too late to make from their lives even one iota of what they were capable? Because, you see gentlemen, these boys are now fertilizing daffodils. But if you listen real close, you can hear them whisper their legacy to you. Go on, lean in. Listen, you hear it? - - Carpe - - hear it? - - Carpe, carpe diem, seize the day boys, make your lives extraordinary.

John Keating in Dead Poet Society

Today I go out on road and see a top of the line Land cruiser and wonder will I ever be able to own one ? today we assume that growth in workplace is a function of your capacity to involve in politics . there is hardly any sense of fair play left and while we still loose to our peers but we don't do it gracefully .

I guess i am growing up . I feel that growing up is just another name society give to the act of learning to limit your possibilities , to limit your horizon , to be realistic and stop dreaming and even stop achieving . People who become big in life are the people who refused to grow up .

Thats the reason people don't like to talk about their first love . Not because talking will remind them of the other person but because the talking will remind them of them self . what they were and what they are now . facing that is far more painful than facing all the stupidity .

I believe that no one ever loose the capacity to love . we just refuse to admit it .our subject of love changes over a periode of time . a teenager has a more propensity to fall in love with someone of opposite sex , same as a guy in his 40's is more probable to fall in love with a professional challenge and someone in his 60's is more likely to search for meaning of life . but with unfailing consistency i see that folks in every age don't follow their calling and pursue their love .

I0 year after watching Neha for the first time I am writing this post as an obituary to my first love . Today I have more than one explanation / justification to believe that first love not meant to be realized .

As someone in late twenties (All right !!! 29) i have developed some more passions . the startup I want to do , The world tour i want to go on , starting a college,making a documentary. I am sure you too must be having some such goals . I hope that 10 year down the line we won't be having similar excuse for these gaols too . I hope that we will be among the third type . i hope that more us will be mutants .

Translating Tipping Point

Sometime back I wrote an article for Pluuggd.in on my fave topic . word of mouth marketing tactics . The article struck a chord with the readers . i got a few emails message of appreciation . one of my friend asked me to write a book on the same topic . I am sure he was joking but his suggestion made me think something about Business bestsellers which is bothering me for a long long time . My biggest problem with Marketing Bestsellers like The Tipping Point , Crossing The Chasm,Innovators dilemma ,Purple Cow etc. is that Context of these books are not Indian , its not internet , its not mobile , it was not written with my neighbor in mind .

I think that there is an opportunity in translating these books for Indian audience ,Indian context, Indian industry and above all Indian entrepreneurs . this is what i am trying to do with this post .I am picking One of my Fave. book "The Tipping Point " by Malcom Gladwell and will attempt to show how this is relevant in india .If you haven't read this book . i suggest that you can read wikipedia article about it .

The Actors :The book says that whenever an idea spreads virally and attains tipping point , it is almost always due to the fact that somewhere in the process of IDEA Diffusion it catches the attention of Three type of people . The Connector , The Maven , The Salesman . First Question to answer : When it comes to your venture , Who can be the actor in this Tipping Point drama ? Where can you find them ? How will you identify them ?

The Connectors : wikipedia says " Connectors are the people who "link us up with the world ... people with a special gift for bringing the world together " . in Soc Nw. Speak Connectors are hubs on social graph. where to start ? our instinctive image of connector is someone who is a smart joe , FAST Talking , All knowing person with an opinion about everything , a walking encyclopedia of some sort . right ?? I am sorry to say but ..WRONG .

Reason we have this assumption is because this is the kind of person we want to connect with . but we miss a vital point here ...do we or our customer feel a connection with them ? or do we see them on a podium? what is the defining link between you and this Smart guy ? is it bonding of homogeneity or spell of authority . if it is spell of authority than this guy is not a Connector . he might probably be a MAVEN [more on that later in the post ] . I know its sounds little vague there is a very fine line of distinction but I guess if you carefully read the paragraph above you will see the difference.

Now second and more important question : where to find them

Look around you and see whom you and your colleague feel connection with . Ideally this connection need to be a connection of affinity but it might be a connection of inertia . With connection of
affinity and regard its hard to exploit the guy's relationship because probably he would be smart enough to not go overboard with recommending your IDEAs .

But luckily, in most cases its connection of inertia . Every office , every housing society , every college , every Fixed route DTC Bus has someone whose business is to say hello to everyone . he is no authority on anything , may be you hated this chap while you were in college and so does everyone but still no one ever said it on his face. and one day he was absent from college and you noticed his absense, logically thinking it should have been a welcome change but hey , when he came back next day and shook hand with you ,Haven't you asked him " how come you were absent yesterday ? Everything ok ? " . There you are . this is what drives that guy . think if you can capitalize on it ?? think hard .

Look for the person who send most Fwd: Emails on your list ,try remembering the guys on LinkedIn who boast about ToplinkedIn 500+ , lookout for the guy who was first to join AMWAY while you were in college, the guy who is a frequent job hooper . guy who by every yardstick deservs to have a girlfriend but don't have one [ Connectors with Girl Friends are rare ] , The guy who is most visible and noisy in office parties and outings , The guy who always eager to drop you home if you stayed late at work [ and you avoid taking his obligation ] and finally guy who always complains that world is not been fair to him but he still continue with his mission of serving the mankind .

Connectors are everywhere and they offer a value to society but its VERY SAD that their contributions are never appreciated by society in general . why ? simply because people always take them for granted .

The Maven : wikipedia says MAVENS are "information specialists," or "people we rely upon to connect us with new information." They accumulate knowledge, especially about the marketplace, and know how to share it with others. fundamentally MAVENs are information broker , they are heavy consumers of media, Mavens are not naturally outgoing like Connectors but they are not BAD Communicator either . mostly you will find them in some strategic roles , where only way to win respect of your subordinates is to be more informed .they will be Project Leaders , CXO, Analyst .

Mavens will give you appointments very easily but they will keep the meeting short . Mavens maintain a communication link with connectors but they don't associate with them . and here is a secret they will never admit . in business MAVEN's are EX Connectors who play Connector's game on different level . a connectors who is available to a selected few . You know what I mean. Don't you ? :)

Now how to identify them ? Well....Its difficult . Not because they are hidden but because they are so rare . When Mavens speak, people listen but they don't speak much . In conferences they will be listening to every talk every discussion very carefully . while their connector friend would be in lobby busy exchanging business cards. they don't give out business card first and neither do they carry stacks of them . but if maven takes your business card stay assured he will visit every page of your website . In business Maven ship is mostly a personal branding exercise . Maven who fail to communicate properly is GEEK. Mavens are usually a good candidates for being entrepreneurs and vice versa .

If finding MAVENs is hard than using them for your benefit is even more so . Best advice is not to try too hard . don't try to approach them directly let the connector do that for you . and best tip to catch their attention is to surprise them with a new piece of information . this might make you look like yet anotherr connector for a while but that's OK .you will be on his radar. Trust me on this one if he is smart enough for your purpose and you are smart enough for his purpose he will make out the diffrence . just keep the link open and Buzzing .


The Salesmen : I have been salesman all my life and based on my experience I can say that Most People hate salesman . but the salesman for our context is not your typical Telemarketer or Door to Door salesperson . A better word for the purpose of our discussion is "believer" or "revolutionary" .

Truth be told , you can't enforce a revolutionary to sign up for your cause . but you can do two things
1 ) Try to cause a blip on their Radar 2) if they adopt your cause than please get out of their way . facilitate them but don't go over the board to endorse them . its very probable that you might have to
break up with them down the line . EBAY ,Digg,You Tube all are successful due to these people only but they can't officially endorse their act . they have tough time maintaining their relationship with these guys . there is a fine line and you should be shrewed enough to know where to draw that line . to sum up revolutionaries are a Nice to have problem .

Where to find them ? contrary to whats shown in Bollywood flicks they don't support a beard and a Red Tilak on their forehead. Profile of revolutionary is very industry or domain specific.There is one defining trait of revolutionaries which is constant across all segments . they are in your industry , they are good at something and they are frustrated & disillusioned . look for these traits . Geeks ,college student can be good candidate. some books also refer them as Early adopter , Power user, Compulsive contributor etc .

so that;s my $0.02 on Identification of ACTORS . I will cover other aspects of Tipping Point in sequels. In the mean time keep your feedback coming .
Wishing you a very Happy New Year .

Richard Branson: Life at 30,000 feet

Watch it .

Here Comes Another Bubble - The Richter Scales

I know its been too much of Video on my blog lately , but i have to share it , its too Good . MUST WATCH .

you can get the mp3 here

The Simpsons - India Outsourcing - Modified

More than Worth a watch .

Most Terrifying Video You'll Ever See

Less Than Four

If you feel SAD,incapable,helpless anytime . Please see this inspiring video .

More details and more of such stuff at Less Than Four .

On Rudeness

My experience is that rude behavior is never forced upon people by circumstance. Some people are rude by nature, some people aren't. Don't tell me you have to be rude to people because of such and such. That's just rationalization.

~ Reg Braithwaite in Off Topic: Meanies!

I don't like rudeness , specially when I am at the receiving end of it~ Anonymous

I never meet a person who says that He/She like rude people . Everyone wants to avoid a rude behavior . thats very understandable . What baffles me is people's perception of rudeness and the approach they adopt to tackle with rude behavior. Most of the time people see rudeness as a personality trait .something in which you don't have a choice .something which is default to you . something as intrinsic to you as your skin . in short , majority of world thinks that Rude people are born rude or you can't do any thing about rude behavior of somebody who has passed a certain age .

I don't think so . I have seen enough of world to believe that rudeness is not a personality trait . its just a situational liberty which some of us exercise . simply saying people are rude because their surrounding allow them to be rude and insensitive . they have no incentive or punishment for acting otherwise . that makes both actor and victim an equal partner in the act of rudeness.

So whenever someone is rude with me First question i ask to myself is

"What's there in my conduct which made this guy think that I deserve this or I will take this & how can i ensure that this doesn't happen again "

Fundamental Attribution Error : (FAE)

The fundamental attribution error (also known as correspondence bias or over attribution effect) is the tendency for people to over-emphasize dispositional, or personality-based, explanations for behaviors observed in others while under-emphasizing situational explanations. In other words, people have an unjustified tendency to assume that a person's actions depend on what "kind" of person that person is rather than on the social and environmental forces influencing the person.

~ From Wikipedia

FAE is a powerful force . Our society have almost internalized this . Whether its a judicial system dealing with a criminal or a Church talking about Attaining Nirvana . Whether its a HR person discussing your performance appraisal or some issue where you disagree with your spouse . Whenever we analysis somebody's behavior ,we see the person in question as a separate , stand alone entity .

Psychology for the most part has been a study in dispositional analysis . We study individual , We study institution , but comparatively a very little research has been done on Individual inside a Institution .and whatever little study we have at our disposal is enough to shatter our understanding . some world famous psychological experiments like Stanford prison experiment has shown that there is very little of our action which is dispositional .

Recently I saw a video of a lecture by my favorite social scientist Dr. Philip Zimbardo . he was talking about "Lucifer Effect : How Good People Turn Evil ". Although his talk was mostly in context of Atrocities done by US soldiers in Abu Garibh but it is not very hard to extrapolate his teaching to our day to day life . I saw some similarity in the context of our understanding of Rude behavior . In his thesis Zimbardo explain how certain situations can lead our mind to believe that its OK to be cruel .

But You Can't Change Human Nature :

No Body can be changed by preaching , You are entitled to change only one person in this universe , that is you yourself ,

~Bhagwat Gita

Whenever I complain about rude behavior of people a lot of times I hear this line in reply ." You can't Change him/her . its His /her Nature" . It has been repeated too many time that sometime I tends to think if its true .

But I don't think its true . Human nature is not something you are born with ,we acquire it .Its not your skin tone or shape of your nose . Its just a set of rule , a code of conduct which we formulate to guide our action . our nature is dependent on conditioning .On what we see around us, how we are treated .what sort of people we deal with . Most of us have this false assumption that these exposers ,interactions leave a permanent effect and human being are not flexible /capable of changing their approach. They might not be open to change but they are surely capable of changing .

Some examples

I belong to a small city in Rajasthan named Sri Ganganagar . Most of the families in my neighborhood have one of their son/relative in UK/Canada . Every year i hear that one or two elderly parents have migrated to Canada to live with their kids . these people are in their late 50s or mid 60s. by any standard of conventional wisdom they are well past the age where they can change anything about there own thinking . Right ? Well................. Wrong .

On more than one occasion I have seen that these guys ,who seems to have strong opinion on Education, conduct,dress ,friend circle of female members of family in India , when they reach South hall they transform in to a Progressive mindset effortlessly . Drinking ,Dating , Late night parties are rampant among girls of UK based Indian and all of these old guys not only approve it but actually they are glad to be a part of it .

Funny......60 Years of "Nature" can easily be undone in 2 months . How ? Context and environment around them don't allow these guys to take liberty .

Australian feels pride in declaring them self as aggressive and say that rudeness is part of their culture . they use this justification to explain why their players pushed a senior Indian leader .I seriously doubt if they would have done the same with Queen of England . so much for Rudeness in DNA argument .

Google wants to provide free access to information to people every where . They refuse to alter the search result even if it hurts the sentiments of Jew . but they accepted the censorship terms with China . so much for mission & value statement . China didn't offer an option and Google Complied .

In 1984 New York city was suffering from a very high crime rate and vandalism on Subway trains . Subway was considered very very unsafe . so much so that Bernhard Goetz became a symbol of New Yorkers' frustrations with a high crime rate when he shot four muggers intent on robbing him on subway train in Manhattan . To deal with this problem Police department of New York city took a radically different approach called Broken Window Theory . Basic premise of Broken Window Theory is that if you change the environment or surrounding of people . you can effectively control their tendency to commit crime .

We don't need speedy justice , we don't need stringent law , we need better enforcement . the whole environment should act as a damper to the urge of committing crime . so in order to solve the problem Police Department , started removing graffiti from walls of subway stations and trains. their top priority was to make subway look exceptionally clean and managed . this had an magical effect . crime rate fall down drastically .

My point behind giving all these examples is that if change in situation / Surrounding can cause a different behavior in people in old age , Giant Organizations like Google, Proud to be rude people of Australia, Crime struck New York city . than why can't we expect to see a similar change in the behavior of rude guys around us .

Your Land Lord, Your Manager , The Guy at convenience store, Your Spouse . Why we are always so hell bent to accept it as "Nature" . is it FAE at work ? is it our aversion to act and escapism to see the reality ? or is it really something one is born with . what do you say ?

Word of caution

Article like this are provocative . they force you to rethink your assumption & steers up the emotion. things are complicated if you are in the receiving end of such behavior for sometime . I know an incedient where someone read a post of mine and had a fight with a colleague . He repent badly for his immature act . My experience is that such spontaneous out burst are not sustainable . you want to change people's behavior and conduct toward you ? than accept that it won't be done overnight . its a painfully slow process

Be very careful in your judgment about Rude behavior . is it a one off incident ...than its ok. We all have a bad day now and again maybe you just bumped into them while they were stuck at a low point. Problem is if its a recurring pattern. than you know its time to change circumstances . Because its not about him only its about You too.

The FaceBook Song

It's Hilarious , do check it out . I Love Facebook

Class Of Late 70s : Transient Generation

Time is Nature's way of ensuring that everything doesn't happen at once .
Space is Nature's way to ensure that everything doesn't happen to you .

Albert Einstein

Some Factoids


My Date of birth is 24th of march 1978 . I went to a Govt. Engg College in 1996 came out of college in 2001 .

When I was in college, computers were expensive, a typical 486 / Pentium I used to cost 35K . 2 GB Hard disk was a luxury.

There was no Cellphone service in KOTA until my second year and until my final year it used to cost 5-12 Rs per minute for incoming call.

There were only three cellphone in college campus . one belong to a Lecturer , another to a Guy who was son of a BIG Shot . Third and most interesting person to posses a cellphone in campus was a Female in final year . Her fiance had gifted her that phone on their engagement . She used to boast about it . [ BTW this particular female was seeing a guy since her high school but ditched him as his new suitor was based in US . In short going to US was a BIG Deal ]

When I was in Final Year I used internet for the first time , I was hooked . It used to cost me 100 Rs /Hour for accessing email . it was painfully slow but it gave a strange pleasure to see that blue status bar moving.

IIT Kanpur was the only place I visited where I can get free internet access . for the first time in my life I read some thing online , without saving it on floppy to read later on college comp. Guess what it was ?? Starr Report on Monica Lewinsky and Bill Clinton scandal .

In second ,third and Final Year of college i got my Project report done from a DTP shop in KOTA , the guy at DTP shop used to have WordStar. We used to hear about Windows 95 and Bill Gates but our computer labs had Monochrome Computers with DOS .

It was very hard to see coffee shop in North India and Coffee for me was synonym to a Cup full of foaming Espresso served in wedding parties .Mojito,tequila, mocha, capachino ,Lasagne,Rossito ,paperoni ,Martini were names of Italian Girls .

Most of the guys were deprived of female company & they used to think of marrying every girl on which they had crush .To tell you the truth they were very sincere with their plans . There was only one small problem . they had never talked to the girl in Question . Too shy /Arrogant/ Masculine to do that .

We used to talk a lot about Kissing scene in RAJA HINDUSTANI . Sex sequence like Murder or Aashique Banaya Aapne were stuff of legend /porn .

Things are a lot different today .

You can get a decent laptop in 35K , I have a WiFi internet at my home and it cost me only 1000/Month . Most of the colleges have net access in Hostel . Cell phone is very common , Going to US is no Big deal , Gmail offer 2GB disk space for free, WordStar is extinct ,CCD and Barista are in every neighborhood. Dating is not a Taboo any more .

If reading all this make you think that I attended college long long time back in past then you are wrong . Every single thing I mentioned above has happened JUST 06 Year back . so why I am talking about all this ? I know some of you might be thinking that this is yet another post by me telling you how world is unfair .

No , Unfortunately this is not the case this time . What i am going to tell here is a long standing observational hypothesis of mine .which i collected and constructed piece by piece for past 2 years . I call this "Theory of Transient Generation " .

What is Transient Generation ??

People are crazy and times are strange
I'm locked in tight, I'm out of range
I used to care, but things have changed
Bob Dylan

Every generation has their time under the sun . Their moment of Un-diverted attention , the time when they could connect to or contribute to everything which was new . When I was in my teens my Dad's generation was Present and My generation was "Near Future" . We were waiting for our Turn when Baton would be passed to us . If my peers belong to Generation X . My Dad belong to generation( X-1) and my Grandfather belong to Generation (X-2. ) and pace of change was such that this equilibrium was sustained for an extended period of time ,at least for more than a decade.


In the tradition of time, Baton was passed to our generation too but I realize that this time around Equilibrium was not stable for that long . We spent our " Hour of Glory" in a transient conditions . Before we realize that future has arrived , Future was over. Baton was unwillingly passed to next generation .

Most of us don't understand the thought process of KIDS who are just 5 year younger to us . In all probability these kids are indicator of things to come but there is a vast gap between us and them . This gap is not easy to explain because difference of Age is very little .why we are so out of sync. That makes me think that Class of late 70s has actually became a Transient Generation.

Circumstantial Evidence for my theory :

Neither me nor any of my friends went to college thinking that we will be getting a salary in the order of double digit lakhs per annum . but today I see freshers with a salary expectation of 7-8 lakhs from the day one . I doubt if standard of education has changed drastically in 05 years . some of it can be attributed to overheated market place .But there is more to it than jsut market . something subtle is missing .

Fresher today are more seasoned than ever before . Almost invariably I fail to see the rebel,Zeal, Ideal ,Naiveness and vigor in freshers. They use word "Professional" very frequently to justify their hostile competitive tactics in workplace . Talk to any freshly minted MBA and you will know what I mean. This chap find it very hard to listen , he always has something to add to what you are telling him . He use vague statements full of buzzwords .you can't really teach any thing to him .This was not that BAD in my time.

When me and my batch mate come out of college market was in recession. jobs were hard to find .I know a lot hardworking and intelligent and deserving students who were not able to find a job . when market begin to recover after few year . Companies began to offer jobs to Fresher and every one who graduated in 2000-2002 was facing the Q " Whats your Industry experience ? " why you were not able to get a job when you were out of college ? surprisingly companies found it hard to hire them even at the level of fresher . Corporate India seems to have deleted most of them from memory.

Around two year back someone asked my friend if she has used Orkut while she was in college ? She said no. There was no orkut at that time . She was told that since you haven't used Orkut in college you can't understand the thought process of Social Networking junkies . she is out of college for 05 years only and she is using ORKUT for 3 years now .

Two year back, sometime in mid February a school girl from my neighborhood asked me . "Kya apke time mein Valentine day hota tha?? " [ Was there a concept of Valentine Day ,In your time ] .

Around a year back a strange incident happened to me . I was coming back from office in an Auto Rikshaw . Amity College is very close to my office . two females in their early twenties asked for a lift up to a Mall .They offered to split the bill . I said thats not needed and obliged . These girls were chit chatting continuously. Our Auto stopped at a Traffic Light . They spotted a couple on a Bike . Probably this couple was from their college .one of the girl said to another " I didn't knew She is seeing Him " . other replied "No, No , She is not seeing him , They are just going around ".

I was amused to hear their conversation so I asked "Excuse me ladies but I overheard your conversation , Please Educate . I am not sure if I understand the difference between "Seeing " and "Going Around " in my times it used to be

Classmates-> Friend-Date-Commitment-->Shaddi .

They laughed and obliged . Here is what they told me

Things are different now . We have various intermediate phase now a days

.Classmates
[or Acquaintance]
|
Friends
[ Part of common gang]
|
Going Around
[Part of a gang but special consideration to the Target]
|
Seeing
[Gang is not a necessary precondition to meet and hang around for daily stuff COACHING ,SHOPPING,Notes exchange]
|
Dating
[ Now they don't need a reason like "Notes" to meet they just spend weekend together and wait for other party to make a move ]
|
Committed
[Starting of Formalizing relationship,by saying declaring on Orkut ,Girls delay it as long as possible]
|
Engagement
[ After both parties are settled in job , parents are involved now ]
|
Wedding
[The END] .

It was most educating 30 min of my life .Six month later someone told me that there is a intermingled state too . Its called "In-Bitween " , this is when you are frustrated/ Disillusioned with your current relationship but keep on dragging it due to peer pressure till you get another opportunity .

Phewwwwwwwwwwwww.

I realized there are so many things around me which i don't know .Age difference between me and those girls ?? 7 Years Max.

About a month back i was observing some kids playing games in my colonies park . they were playing an age old game which i am sure you too have played at their age . Its called "उंच- नीच " [ High Land -Low Land ]

I noticed that they have changed the rule of game. In my times whosoever was on High land was not compelled to come to low land . they can stay there for as long as they want and guy on the low land was forced to wait . game used to be a bit boring unless person on the highland choose to make it funny by coming down .

This is not the case now .under the modified rule of game player on the high land need to keep singing a song as long as he is on highland . if you want to take a break form singing you need to get down to low land . so game was more fun . I was riveted to see how small kid balanced singing and running . it was not dull . is it just about game ? I think this change in game has reflect a change in society too . Now Children realize at very young age that you can't stay at Top without doing something . Don't take me wrong but i think the main reason is that when I was a kid, Rules of Game were designed by children of Govt. Employees . Today its Children Of IT Professional in MNC who are making the rule . but do we know that Rules have changed ??

Who did it ?

I am sure about my Observation of events but to understand the cause of event you need to have a deeper understanding of complex dynamics of socio economic forces . I am not a sociologist so I am not sure how accurate my reasoning is . Still in my view main reason for this rapid and exponential change and this vast disconnect between two chronologically adjacent age group is due to following reasons .

Access to Internet : Access to internet is more cheap today . I have a Wi Fi network at my apartment it cost me only 3000 Rs to setup and now i have 24X7 Internet access for 1000 Rs /month . same is true for most of the college . Access to internet in formative years widen the horizon of student and this exposer at right time in growing up has contributed a lot to this difference .

Access To Mobile Phone : Owning a mobile phone means more than just a convenience of communication . Owning a mobile phone in formative years allow its user to cultivate a social network independent of your family and more confirming to your peer. Mobile phone has affected our thinking in many ways than we consciously know. Kids are allowed to stay out of home till late night because parents have this sense of security that they can reach their kids any time .

Its easier for Kids to maintain a communication channel out side of parental supervision . MMS,SMS," Miss call " all of these stuff have made communication between teenagers and specially teenagers of opposite sex more convenient . This has a far reaching effect .

If you really want to understand the impact of mobile phone on social psyche i suggest reading Howard Rheingold's Classic book SMART MOBS .

Exposer to Alternate Media : For the most part of our life we were exposed to only DoorDarshan although there were some cable TV Channel while we were in high school still the content of these channel were not radically different form DD .

Today KIDS have access to Animax,Discovery ,AXN,MTV,ZOOM. On internet they have access to community of every type.From Bike enthusiast to Fine Arts . From Independent Music to Gay and Lesbian .

Economics : A significant number of students who are coming out of college these days have one of their Parents,Elder sibling or someone else in neighborhood who has been in IT or MNC for sometime . it affects student in many ways .

sometime it offers as a higher benchmark , some time it works as a role model , some case it means that student goes to college with more Pocket money . almost always it means a better guidance to chart out their carrier.

There are many more reasons like Proliferation of Call center, students doing summer jobs in BPO.

Experimentation in Bollywood movies which has made us more tolerant to certain taboo.

Isolation of working class youths from national political agenda because much of their life is effected more from Rupee -Dollar Exchange rate than who is ruling in Center .

BRIC Report and Euphoria it generated,

Sania Mirza, Twenty20 World Series,Sri Santh

List is long and I admit that I don't know about all of them . Looking at all these factor and their implication it seems everything which happened was inevitable . Do you agree ??


Epilogue : For the records I am not trying to say that Class of Late 70s have lost their chance or we can not do anything significant and we should silently walk down to oblivion . No . Thats not what i am saying .

I am from Class of Late 70s and i believe that Best is yet to come for me .All I am trying to do is to Estimate the size of our challenge. I always believe that first step to solve any problem is to admit that there is a problem. Thats the sole purpose of writing this post . . So Do you agree that we have got a problem here ??

Thanks for reading this long post .

Photo Courtesy : Flavio Ronco . you can see his flickr stream here

Facebook End Game

I am a Big FAN of Facebook and like thousands of internet enthusiast I see Mark Zukerberg as a HERO . He has created a Giant distribution Platform called Social Graph . He did it on his vision of Internet and social media . Some of his moves like Newsfeed, Opening up the platform for Third party application developers , Not doing a revenue split deal with Application developers and finally Facebook Fund are nothing short of a Masterstroke .

He has turned down the deal from Yahoo and he insist to maintain FB as an independent company . Cyberspace is abuzz with the Fear,excitement and anticipation of next move of this Boy wizard . Most Frequently Asked Question is

How will he plan and time his Exit ? Will it be through IPO or through Acquisition ?

Most of the folks think that Facebook will go public at a valuation of some where between the range of 25-35 Billions USD . Thats a lot of money .IPO Advocate says that FB will go public because there is no one who can afford to buy them at the valuation FB team want .

I think it will not be a good move for FB to go public . They should sellout .

Why ?

Short and sweet answer is Due to unrealistic expectations . When Google decide to go public and filed S1 . Their earning details came as a pleasant surprise to many folks . This is not the case with FB . No matter what number they put as their revenue , it will always be a disappointment . In a hyped environment reaction to the same hype machine will work against him and it can spiral FB to doom . This is not to say that Mark and VCs who invested in FB will not get good ROI if they go public . they will , but Mark's vision of FB will be lost .

You may say that haven't we seen this before ? with Netscape ? YES . But Netscape was a pioneer and back than there was no history behind internet , things are different today we have a DOT COM Bust behind us . Netscape too got some MAD money valuation but they have a good revenue from their enterprise clients . This is not the case with FB .

Fact is that in spite of all his greatness ,Mark can't be exempted from the BIG question about viability of FB as a business and Once FB file for IPO they will have to face this Question every quarter .They have created a seemingly"Perpetual Motion Machine" . If they stay independent they will have to feed it with something . that "something" is not apparent as of now .

Why Sellout??

I think for FB ,biggest advantage of selling is that selling out would give them a reason [ Excuse ] for course correction .

FB is a Great distribution platform ,they have done a great job by separating application and Social graph . Now they control the social graph and you and I can write application to ride over it . thats all very good . but This was not something which could not be copied by My Space or Orkut . so in order to differentiate their offering Mark played a Brilliant move by opening API for free. Whole world was at their feet.

This limelight comes with its own price tag . There were many instances where a one man company made a popular service . FB user started to use it but it was hard for the programmer to sustain it , and company went bust . Leaving FB with an unsupported application and unhappy users. Our Hero made another master stroke "FB Fund" .

What worry me is that He is doing all this with VC money . not from FB Revenues . VC Funds will not last forever and in absences of a massive revenue these Question will haunt FB too . if not now than may be some years down the line .

Opening platform for free was good move but moving away from "Free" under Marks Leadership will take sheen from his image . so they need a scapegoat . and i feel impact of such policy shift are moderate if there is a change in ownership .

We have an example of GrandCentral , a startup which offered a telephone number for life , Once you have a Grand Central Number you need not to change it when you change service provider , move to a new city or whatever . They promised "One Number for One Life " very romantic .Grand Central got acquired by Google . with in few weeks of selling out . Google changed the policy and issued new numbers to existing GC users . There was a small outcry but Google silenced them by offering money for reprinting Biz cards .

Grand Shift in ideology , little flutter , little money and things are going on smoothly since , GC is still signing new users .

If Tomorrow FB wants to take a corrective action like say a 5-10% revenue split with its existing app developer or they want to sell Flash overlay adds on small widget based TV on every profile . Given his image , doing this will be hard for Mark. So he may collect the money and run to do next venture . but if some other company say Google or MSFT do it ?

Like grand central there will be little unrest and people will abuse MSFT for greed and FB will keep going . In my opinion that will be a Good End game for Facebook exit .

Extra :

Now that i am at Crystal Ball Gazing i can't resist temptation to talk about some thing else

Who will buy FB ?? Microsoft

at What valuation 16-18 Bill.

Why do i think so ? I don't think so its a guess .

These are my view and I admit that there is a possibility that I might be wrong and Mark and his team can come up with some new strategy to address these issues and stay independent . I will be a happy man if thats the case .

Whats your take on FaceBook Endgame ?